The Facebook page for Captain Planet is pretty much what you’d expect for the brand defined by 90s environmentalism – lots of old clips from the show, messages promoting environmental causes and holidays, and a generally progressive, positive view of things. Because, in case you missed the message of Captain Planet, that’s sorta the whole point: caring about one another, promoting peace and kindness, and generally being considerate of others and the world around you.
And in that spirit, the Captain Planet page recently posted a message supporting Australia’s push to legalize gay marriage in their country (yes, it’s still not legal there!). If you have any familiarity with Captain Planet, this should be the least surprising thing ever. But, for a few people who are fans of the Captain Planet Facebook yet for some reason don’t agree with the brand’s progressive worldview, this came as something of a shock – but luckily Captain Planet was ready to step in and explain why “basic human rights and decency” was an okay thing to stand up for:
And while the good Captain got to a lot of them, there were a few that didn’t get the official reply, so we thought we’d address them here:
“Captain Planet Wants Every Couple On Earth To Be Capable of Reproduction!”
This was meant to be read sarcastically, but the truth is: YES, YOU ARE RIGHT. Less kids, less overpopulation, less pollution! And while gay couples can’t reproduce purely through sexual intercourse, lots of gay couples raise children through adoption, artificial insemination, and other methods.
“Having Parents of Different Genders Is Inherently Good. There Have Definitely Never Been Bad Parents When It’s A Mother and Father.”
People who shouldn’t be allowed to have kids, according to Sign-Asshole over here:
- Singe parents in general
- Gay couples
The truth is, you just need someone to raise you who can teach you the basic tenets of human decency, which Sign-Asshole’s Parent(s) clearly did not.
“I’ve Been Mad At A Cartoon About Environmentalism For The Past 30 Years”
“I’m angry at a kids show I didn’t like 30 years ago, so I’ll continue interacting and engaging with the Facebook page to explain how I never liked it.”
Thankfully, there ARE plenty of Captain Planet fans out there who remember the show’s message of love and peace and kindness. Because seriously. ONE OF THE PLANETEERS WAS “HEART.” HOW DID YOU MISS THAT?!