When you’re a kid, it’s easy to believe whatever dumb “fact” you’re told by an adult or peer.
Hell, it’s easy to believe just about anything when your view of the world is all wide-eyed curiosity and magical.
Good thing we actually become jaded, bitter adults who know better.
Look at this stupid fucking idiot. via shutterstock
1. shut-your-noise meets a sentient car.
My grandad told me when I was quite young that he drove the car and the car knew where we were going and used the indicators to tell him which way to go, he just followed its instructions. He even used to get in the car and say “morning car, we’re going to Morrison’s today”. I believed this for an embarrassingly long time.
2. mauri11 meets Slenderman.
A very skinny man lived inside the street light poles switching the lights from green to red.
3. Syek26 knows how to stop tornadoes.
As a kid I believed garbage and litter caused tornadoes. Not really sure why, but when I saw a plastic wrapper on the ground I’d pick it up and smugly say ‘no tornadoes happening today!’. I no longer believe this to be true.
4. Knot_My_Name finds the G-Spot.
That a G spot was just somewhere that felt good to be touched or kissed. Like I believed my neck was my “G spot” until I was like 17.
5. Majestic_Dildocorn is gonna need a bigger boat.
the pool light is a trap door leading to the ocean and sharks can come through it and the sharks will eat me, but only if I’m in the deep end alone.
6. Sect5 goes all natural.
Dad said the world was running out of TP, so we’d have to use leaves. 5 y/o me used leaves and I don’t wanna talk about it.
7. kinglee0 doesn’t know shit about Thomas Edison facts.
In elementary school up until about 4th grade, I was convinced that Thomas Edison had invented the spoon
8. swaggy-spectacles probably went to Catholic school.
I used to think that a woman would get breast cancer if she let a man touch her breasts.
9. cerslicer doesn’t quite understand recycling.
Because of the way my dad explained recycling to me when I was 3, for the longest time I thought it was like a trading system. I lived in China at the time so the only recycling bin I ever saw was a big one at my school. I remember the school announcing its installation, which then prompted me to ask my dad what it was. He explained it as a special box where you put things, and then someone else takes it and turns it into someone new. I thought that the “something new” was something I got to have. I remember my dad putting newspaper in the recycling, and me checking the bin day after day for the “something new”
10. s4ilorm00n breeds fruit fish.
When I was about 5 years old, I thought the inside bits of a pomegranate were “nemo eggs” and tried hatching a bunch of them in a sink full of water.
11. Trick_Blue avoids pharmaceuticals.
When I was a kid I believed that if you took a medicine for a condition you didn’t have, it would cause you to have symptoms of that condition. Like if you didn’t have allergies and took Benadryl it would give you allergies. I believed this until I was like 18.
12. not_a_fangirl gets arrested.
If I watched a TV show for 8+ yo while I am 7, police will come
13. WeaponsGradeDouche makes limes into lemonade.
Limes were just lemons that weren’t ripe yet.
14. Ontokkii on womanhood.
That once you get your period you’ll bleed every day for the rest of your life. I don’t know how I misunderstood sex ed that badly, but boy am I glad I was wrong.
15. Amlethoe talks dirty.
I took “oral sex” a bit too literally, as in “talking sex”. I thought it was like phone sex or just saying sexy stuff